to give to anyone who ask, I have family members who will constantly ask money, food, just about anything, but refuse to get a job or apply for assistance. I am on oxygen 24/7 and I live on a small disability check, and gladly pay for help around the house but they act like I have unlimited resources. My question is should I keep giving to them when my money is tight, I know God has always made way for me but I get tired of worrying about making ends meet.
Your situation is one that is difficult to deal with in the best way. These are your family and you love them. It can be hard to begin to establish reasonable boundaries in such relationships. But it is never too late to do so.
As others have said, being honest about your financial situation and the future you face being disabled so that your family members can see that you are not able to continue to "rescue" them or support them financially. I suggest that you inform them that you expect them to get jobs or assistance instead of taking advantage of you any longer. This is hard to say to loved ones and even harder to follow through on, but, in the end, it will be best for all. Your family members may be angry and manipulative towards you when you take such a stand, but you can lean on the Lord to keep you strong and mature in these relationships. When they try to emotionally blackmail you when they cannot get the money from you again, know that this behavior is wrong and you don't deserve it. They are adults and it is best for them to support themselves and learn to live within their means as you are doing.
We love our children and grandchildren dearly. This makes it hard for us to deny them what they ask and to see them go without. I will be praying for you and your family.
It's a hard balance , you need some help , they need some cash and also they are your family so it's delicate . Be tactful and kind , maybe they don't realise how little you have , let them know that you are not rich and that you can't be relied upon to provide all the time .
If I was you , I would choose one or two of them , stick to those and make sure they understand and agree with your decision , then let the others know that you only need one or two and the rest of them you just can't afford .
You know each of them , you know who are the most reliable of them and the ones in genuine need . Speak to them individually , when you are alone with them . Explain your circumstances , be tactful and kind and pray about all this first . Talk to God and tell Him your fears , He wants to hear you , through Jesus Christ our Redeemer . Pray about this and wait for His Word to guide you .
You are not doing these people any favours by allowing them to take advantage of you , especially if they are capable of providing for themselves .
As Christians we should always be ready and willing to help anyone in genuine need , if we can . If these people are able to work or claim some assistance from the government then that's what they should do .
Have you ever thought that God sees them taking advantage of you and may decide to punish them for their behaviour ? Also you may be hindering them from moving forward in their lives and taking responsibility for themselves .
Doing what is right in God's sight isn't always obvious , we have to trust that God will put everyone where they are supposed to be and the best thing you can do for these people is to pray , every day for them . Help those in genuine need without hesitation but remember that help comes in different forms and the best help is always from above .
to give to anyone who ask, I have family members who will constantly ask money, food, just about anything, but refuse to get a job or apply for assistance. I am on oxygen 24/7 and I live on a small disability check, and gladly pay for help around the house but they act like I have unlimited resources. My question is should I keep giving to them when my money is tight, I know God has always made way for me but I get tired of worrying about making ends meet.
Your situation is one that is difficult to deal with in the best way. These are your family and you love them. It can be hard to begin to establish reasonable boundaries in such relationships. But it is never too late to do so.
As others have said, being honest about your financial situation and the future you face being disabled so that your family members can see that you are not able to continue to "rescue" them or support them financially. I suggest that you inform them that you expect them to get jobs or assistance instead of taking advantage of you any longer. This is hard to say to loved ones and even harder to follow through on, but, in the end, it will be best for all. Your family members may be angry and manipulative towards you when you take such a stand, but you can lean on the Lord to keep you strong and mature in these relationships. When they try to emotionally blackmail you when they cannot get the money from you again, know that this behavior is wrong and you don't deserve it. They are adults and it is best for them to support themselves and learn to live within their means as you are doing.
We love our children and grandchildren dearly. This makes it hard for us to deny them what they ask and to see them go without. I will be praying for you and your family.
If I was you , I would choose one or two of them , stick to those and make sure they understand and agree with your decision , then let the others know that you only need one or two and the rest of them you just can't afford .
You know each of them , you know who are the most reliable of them and the ones in genuine need . Speak to them individually , when you are alone with them . Explain your circumstances , be tactful and kind and pray about all this first . Talk to God and tell Him your fears , He wants to hear you , through Jesus Christ our Redeemer . Pray about this and wait for His Word to guide you .
As Christians we should always be ready and willing to help anyone in genuine need , if we can . If these people are able to work or claim some assistance from the government then that's what they should do .
Have you ever thought that God sees them taking advantage of you and may decide to punish them for their behaviour ? Also you may be hindering them from moving forward in their lives and taking responsibility for themselves .
Doing what is right in God's sight isn't always obvious , we have to trust that God will put everyone where they are supposed to be and the best thing you can do for these people is to pray , every day for them . Help those in genuine need without hesitation but remember that help comes in different forms and the best help is always from above .
( Luke 6:28)
In a way, they are using you. So pray they can understand or pray God will provide you with money.
God bless.
You said you are on oxygen 24/7 and I live on a small disability check,
I believe those who keep coming to you for help should be the one's helping you as much as you help them.
Don't feel guilty if you feel misused.
God bless you
This comment thread is locked. Please enter a new comment below to start a new comment thread.
Note: Comment threads older than 2 months are automatically locked.
Do you have a Bible comment or question?
Posting comments is currently unavailable due to high demand on the server.
Please check back in an hour or more. Thank you for your patience!
Report Comment
Which best represents the problem with the comment?